One Community, moving in the same direction.
Monday, December 22, 2014
The Santa Claus Workout
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Santa Claus here. With just a week to go until the Big Dance, things are hopping here at the North Pole. While the elves make their final preparations, I’m busy preparing myself physically and mentally for my grueling 24-hour work shift delivering toys to boys and girls around the world.
Yes, I do have magic to help me, but magic only gets you so far. You need to be in pretty good physical condition to do my job.
Now, I know what you might be thinking. Santa? In good physical condition?
Yes, it appears I have a belly that shakes like a bowl full of jelly. It’s part of my personal brand. But thanks to elf magic, I’m able to maintain my rotund physique, while simultaneously being a specimen of peak physical health and conditioning. Suck on that, mortals!
Anyways, I thought I’d share with you the HIIT (high intensity interval training) routine I use to get in shape for my Christmas Eve flight. It works for me, maybe it will work for you.
Maybe. Only if you’re good.
Perform each exercise back-to-back with no rest. After you complete a circuit, rest for thirty seconds. Complete the circuit 10 times, 5 times if you’re a mortal man. If you can’t do one set, you’re on the Needs-to-Get-Their-Lazy-Butt-in-Shape List. Expect to receive a lump of broccoli in your stocking this year.